Life: What makes it worth it?

Megan
Oct 10, 2022
3 min read

Dear AskMeg<3, I think my best days are past me and I am largely unhappy. How do I look forward to a future that will be worse than the past?

Sincerely,

Elvis Conejo

Dear Elvis Conejo,

It's never too late.

Something just needs to change. Rest assured it will be okay, life is all about balance.

Let's dig a little deeper.

First,

If it was so much better in the past, think of specifically why? What made you so happy?

Security, money, power, love, a job, a person, a lifestyle, food, an activity, a hobby, religion, a routine, friends, events, a pet, the movies/shows/music being released at the time?

Then,

Think of why you don't have that anymore. Do you really still want it or do you need an updated version?

Now,

think of where you're at currently and what exactly makes you so unhappy. Is it your job, is it a person, is it your environment, is it your lack of something, do you miss a specific attribute about yourself?

I don't think it can just be that life is moving forward or different, because everyone's going through that every day. (If it is, and you are having trouble handling this fact, you may want to speak with a mental health professional.)

The problem is you want a change. A different life, and you can make that happen.

Yes, you just get the life you're given, but every day that you wake up, you are allowed to change who you are. You just have to decide.

You also need to change your perspective.

If you're assuming it will be worse than ever before for the rest of your life... guess what you're gonna get. Because you're the one at the wheel. If that's what you put in the GPS, it's where you're gonna drive to. Go somewhere else.

You can make a complete career change literally today. You can go join a club with people who love what you love, or start a club. Find a new partner. Move somewhere else. Decide to be vegan or a health nut. Decide to join a gym. Decide to stop being a health nut. Write that book, start that restaurant, get the pilot license, and do what you really want to do. No one is stopping you but you. Maybe money, depending on what it is, but if so, make the decision to save specifically for it. Start crowdfunding, hold events to fundraise. You can absolutely do whatever will make you happy.

I'd also like to revisit my saying, "it's never too late."

Julia Child published her first cookbook at 50 years old. Stan Lee was 40 when he published Fantastic Four, starting the Marvel Universe.

Vera Wang was 40, Henry Ford was 45, Samuel L. Jackson was 43, Kris Jenner was 52, Rodney Dangerfield was 46, Instant Ramen was invented when the guy was 48, Betty White was 51, Steve Carrell was 42, Ray Croc the McDonald's guy was 52, Little House on the Prairie was written at 65, Colonel Sanders was 62, Gladys Burrill ran a marathon at 92!!!

Your life isn't over. You just need to figure out what will make you happy again.

I also want to seriously suggest therapy. And it's not for everyone, but probably just because of the perception you have of it, or the style it's in. There's this really easy company called Better Help and you can literally just text a therapist. You don't have to talk on the phone or facetime or video call, but you also absolutely can!!

You can also switch therapists easily if you don't like who you're matched with. There's an infinite type of people who are therapists, you can find one similar to you.

This message just sounds like you may be depressed and want some help moving forward and finding what you need and how to get it. You can also try it out, with no commitment, just explain to them where you're at and why you're deciding to give this a try.

Either way, make a plan. That's all you need. You. Will. Be. Okay.

Also as a homework task. Every morning. Find something to look forward to.

Dinner at the end of the day. Your favorite show's new episode. The nice warm shower you'll take. The cake you're gonna bake next week for your friend's birthday. Christmas. Getting a fish. Seeing your partner when they get home from work. Taking a nice poop LOL.

It can be anything. Just think of at least one thing, every morning.

There is always joy. Here's your flashlight 🔦 , go find it.

Hope this helps!

Xoxo,

AskMeg<3

PS: here are resources just in case

Crisis line: call 988 or text 741-741

Suicide line: also call 988

Domestic abuse: call 800-799-7233 or text 88788

AA Hotline: Call 925-829-0666

Mental Disorders/Addiction for self or Family: call 1-800-662-4357

Grief Hotline: call 1-800-395-5755